I have a thought when i was thinking about my past.
These day is very hard for me to deal with, People ought to assuming that i`m such an asshole person which i think its not fair. Some people says "Dont judge a book by its cover". well i guess in my case, such quote doesnt reflects any shit. i`m tired of people who trying to stab my back, i`m tired of being treated unrespect., i`m tired about people telling me what they want. i`m tired of listening for those who has a two face, I`m tired being used. Fuck Em, I aint give a shit anymore.
A few days ago, something quite shocking happend to me. the bast part is i might get a job in Coles Myer. i`m still waiting for the answer though. i was sucked at the interview i guess, but i have a confidence to get the job. and the worst part is that i have to face Her again in 2005 january. she told me that she`ll come to study again. well i guess its not because she wanted to study at the first place. I reckon she`s coming back because of the fuck face.
I`m not sure about my feeling right now. but seems like i`m quite sad with her decision. Why??
I have so many WHY question in my mind.
But this time i will keep it in my heart and my mind instead to show my emotional part.
Its hard for me nowadays to keep my standard of my result in school. because i couldnt concentrate when i was at home. there are small confrontation between my housmate. but i think i`m not gonna tell a story about it. cause i wanna stick to my plan. this site is only for her.dedicated for her. who hurt me so much, rip my world apart, made me miserable and fuckin stoned about life. Well i decided that i might not send you the letter and let you know about my feelings until i will fade away from your life forever. Well your decision to came back to Sydney really bothers me a lot. I know its your money and you have rights to go wherever you wanted. But to tell you the truth its hard for me to have an easy n happy life to face with your appearance. The fact that we might meet somewhere in the shooping mall, in the street, on the bus or whatsoever really annoyed me. Since i respect your decision, i hope you will understand my decision and my perception as well..
At least i already tried my best to make you happy. I am done, Today is the day you have a final presentation. u just called me and asked me to come. Well i hope you will show your best, off course i hate to see you fail your final project. I believe in you.
I have to tell you something that i couldnt express. i knew that you also one of those bastard who spread a bad rumours about me. You told everyone in your group that i`m bastard bla bla bla. The impact of it really pissed me off even though i`m okay with it. Cat is an asshole and biatch. She was trying to spread and influence my class mate to hate me. but unfortunately some of my class mate turn to hate her. well i guess she got her own lesson by being such a big mouth. Army told me that Cat was telling her something about me. haha thx army.. she trust me and turn to set an arrow to that bitch. Well i guess you cindy should stop doing that. i never try to make you look bad in my friends group. i always respect you. but since you chose to be one of them. i can tell you now that i`m okay with it. it aint matter to me.. cause i`m tired.
Its better for someone who express their feeling towards purely rather to talk n assuming something behind of it. The reason i went nuts is because i`m lost. At least i show you The reality inside me. I never show fake or acting scenes when i was with you.
Well if you are a smart girl. you wont hate me like you hate me today
your choice for being like this i couldnt blame you.
I am lonely yeah. still i dunno what will happend to my future.
i might drop my study if..1. i fail one of my subject...2. if i fuck up once again and drown in a big hole...3. the rest part is because of your apperance. i rather go in some place alone.
I missed my parents because they are so understanding these day
especially my DAD who always support me n love me without showing it instead of proving it.
I`m so grateful that i given a chance to achieve my goal instead of continue my family business which i`m not into with.
I hope that time will go fast so i can find my own happiness.
Until Later....i`ll write again..
" To be happy is the choice i wish to make in spite of the circumstances that are strewn in my path".
These day is very hard for me to deal with, People ought to assuming that i`m such an asshole person which i think its not fair. Some people says "Dont judge a book by its cover". well i guess in my case, such quote doesnt reflects any shit. i`m tired of people who trying to stab my back, i`m tired of being treated unrespect., i`m tired about people telling me what they want. i`m tired of listening for those who has a two face, I`m tired being used. Fuck Em, I aint give a shit anymore.
A few days ago, something quite shocking happend to me. the bast part is i might get a job in Coles Myer. i`m still waiting for the answer though. i was sucked at the interview i guess, but i have a confidence to get the job. and the worst part is that i have to face Her again in 2005 january. she told me that she`ll come to study again. well i guess its not because she wanted to study at the first place. I reckon she`s coming back because of the fuck face.
I`m not sure about my feeling right now. but seems like i`m quite sad with her decision. Why??
I have so many WHY question in my mind.
But this time i will keep it in my heart and my mind instead to show my emotional part.
Its hard for me nowadays to keep my standard of my result in school. because i couldnt concentrate when i was at home. there are small confrontation between my housmate. but i think i`m not gonna tell a story about it. cause i wanna stick to my plan. this site is only for her.dedicated for her. who hurt me so much, rip my world apart, made me miserable and fuckin stoned about life. Well i decided that i might not send you the letter and let you know about my feelings until i will fade away from your life forever. Well your decision to came back to Sydney really bothers me a lot. I know its your money and you have rights to go wherever you wanted. But to tell you the truth its hard for me to have an easy n happy life to face with your appearance. The fact that we might meet somewhere in the shooping mall, in the street, on the bus or whatsoever really annoyed me. Since i respect your decision, i hope you will understand my decision and my perception as well..
At least i already tried my best to make you happy. I am done, Today is the day you have a final presentation. u just called me and asked me to come. Well i hope you will show your best, off course i hate to see you fail your final project. I believe in you.
I have to tell you something that i couldnt express. i knew that you also one of those bastard who spread a bad rumours about me. You told everyone in your group that i`m bastard bla bla bla. The impact of it really pissed me off even though i`m okay with it. Cat is an asshole and biatch. She was trying to spread and influence my class mate to hate me. but unfortunately some of my class mate turn to hate her. well i guess she got her own lesson by being such a big mouth. Army told me that Cat was telling her something about me. haha thx army.. she trust me and turn to set an arrow to that bitch. Well i guess you cindy should stop doing that. i never try to make you look bad in my friends group. i always respect you. but since you chose to be one of them. i can tell you now that i`m okay with it. it aint matter to me.. cause i`m tired.
Its better for someone who express their feeling towards purely rather to talk n assuming something behind of it. The reason i went nuts is because i`m lost. At least i show you The reality inside me. I never show fake or acting scenes when i was with you.
Well if you are a smart girl. you wont hate me like you hate me today
your choice for being like this i couldnt blame you.
I am lonely yeah. still i dunno what will happend to my future.
i might drop my study if..1. i fail one of my subject...2. if i fuck up once again and drown in a big hole...3. the rest part is because of your apperance. i rather go in some place alone.
I missed my parents because they are so understanding these day
especially my DAD who always support me n love me without showing it instead of proving it.
I`m so grateful that i given a chance to achieve my goal instead of continue my family business which i`m not into with.
I hope that time will go fast so i can find my own happiness.
Until Later....i`ll write again..
" To be happy is the choice i wish to make in spite of the circumstances that are strewn in my path".
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