Before-After

This is the Governer of California State..Mr Arnold..

A brave cat

I wonder what happend next to the cat...Feel free to give your comment...

Aye Poem!

1)
I have a pen
My pen is blue
I have a friend
I stabbed him to death with my pen.

2)
Twinkle, twinkle little star
How I wonder what you are
Actually I don’t any more
Thanks to modern astronomy
Which has destroyed all my youthful illusions
You bastards.

3)
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Thank you, Captain Obvious.


4)
This is a haiku
This line, seven syllables
But this one has five.

5)
This is a poem
It’s a bloody good poem
I’m a good poet
Ok, that’s all for now
Later......

100 question

1. FULL NAME: Zico Chiuman
2. NICKNAMES: Zic, Zizi, Co, muka buntu, etc
3. EYE COLOR: eerrrr....brown? not sure
4. HEIGHT: 178 cm, i`m quite happy with God`s gift.
5. HAIR: Copper Brown, but naturally is black
6. SIBLINGS: Na...
7. DO YOU LIKE TO SING IN THE SHOWER: Hell No, that sounds 80`s
8. DO YOU LIKE TO DANCE IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR: No Fuckin Way
9. BIRTH DATE: January 31st
10. ADDRESS: Sussex street
11. CITY: Shitney
12. STATE: NSW
13. SEX: male with balls
14. RIGHTY OR LEFTY: righty!
15. WHAT DO YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP: Loyalty, Honesty and trust
16. HAVE YOU EVER CHEATED: Sure did, thats why i got pissed with biatch
17. DO YOU HAVE YOUR LICENSE: Yes, in my country
18. DO YOU HAVE A CAR: Not now, i am still using my parents car.

Favorites:
19. MOVIES: I love movie that basically based on true story, such as Remember the titans, Friday night lights and Perfect Storm. stuff like that..the reason is simple, because by something that had happend in the past. we can learn something from it. I love historical thing, as a result i am a big fan of Muhammad Ali or you may say Howard Hughes. I wanna be tough like Ali and rich like Hughes..but it wont happend in my life :P

20. SONGS: I used to love a Rock music a lot, but because of most of the Japz friends i hang out with, i started to listen to J POP till today. Although i dont understand about the language but the beat and the chorus sounds damn right and tight. X Japan Rocks!

21.FAVORITE SINGER: Well, i only can come up with one person..Gavin Rossdale. a husband of Gwen Stefani and used to be a band of Bush!

22. FAVORITE TV SHOW(s): I like punk`d hosted by Ashton Kutcher, Apprentice and Survivor.

23. ACTOR: Denzel Washington, Robert Deniro, Samuel L Jackson, etc
24. ACTRESS: Uma Thurman, urggg
25. FOOD: Bulgogi, Katsu Curry, Sushi etc2
26. NUMBER: always and always gonna be 6, it means lucky for me
27. CARTOON: Southpark, Madagascar, Shark Tale and etc
28. DISNEY CHARACTER: Toy Story?

Love Life:
29. DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED: yeah in 2009 hopefully,
30. HOW OLD DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU HAVE YOUR FIRST CHILD: when it is 2011, it is the year of Rabbit. i believe in Chinesse Horoscope shit
31. HOW OLD DO YOU WANNA BE WHEN YOU GET MARRIED?: 2009 or 2011

32. WOULD YOU HAVE KIDS BEFORE MARRIAGE: I hate kids...they are so annoying
33. DO YOU HAVE A BF/GF: Yes sir
34. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH: yeahhh.
35: GUYS/GIRLS: i love booty...u figure what i mean
36. Believe in love at first site? Maybe..
37. Have you been in love? Yeah..
38. Any regrets? Never...

39. What kind of guy/girl do you look for? Long hair, Tall one, buxom type of a chix is my cup of tea.

40. Ever find her? What in the blue are u saying?
41. If so .. Whats her name? Valencia
42. Do you think theres only one person in the world for you? Well i always believe that there is always a love triangle in a person`s life. jealousy, hatred thats all about Love..

ME ME ME:
43. WEIRD SAYING: Heng Hong
44. FAVORITE SAYING: pelacur jadah
45. WHAT SCHOOL DO YOU GO TO: Insearch UTS
46. HAVE YOU EVER TAKEN DRUGS: Once in a life time..
47. WHAT'S A MAJOR TURN ON FOR YOU: When she`s dancing like Emily Rose
48. HOW FAR WOULD YOU GO ON A FIRST DATE: Kiss on da lips should be aight

THE PERSON YOU KNOW WHO IS:
49. MOST BLONDE: Hmm.. Yaya?
50. BEST PERSON: Andre Pitoy
51. NICEST: All my buddies
52. FUNNIEST: Andre Pitoy.
53. STRANGEST: Donny
54. WHICH 6 PEOPLE ARE YOU OPEN WITH AND TRUST THE MOST?: my mate and my family.
55. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF SOUL MATES: someone that you can trust for life
56. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU CRIED WITH:my girlfriend

57. ARE YOU HAPPY: Just so so

58. WHAT IS AN OBJECT YOU CANT LIVE WITHOUT: uh...computer?

59. LOVE OR LUST: Both

60.TRUST OR HONESTY: BOTH, those two are important for me.

61. SILVER OR GOLD: Silver
62. DIAMOND OR PEARL: Pearl
63. SUNSET OR SUNRISE:Sunrise baby..
64. HAVE YOU EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING: nahhh!
65. DO YOU SLEEP WITH STUFFED ANIMALS OR REGULAR ANIMALS: no..
66. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS: Nah

67. WHAT COLOR UNDIES/BOXERS/BREIFS ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW: What do you care ?
68. WHAT SONG ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW: Bonnie Pink
69. WHAT ARE THE LAST 4 DIGITS OF YOUR PHONE NUMBER: 1234
70. WHERE WOULD YOU WANT TO GO ON YOUR HONEYMOON: Europe for sure, 71. WHAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX: EYES...and appearance

72:WHAT'S YOUR FAVORTIE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL: historical stuff

73. FAVORITE SPORT: Basketball

74. WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY: the fact that i live my life to the fullest

75. WHAT'S THE NEXT CD YOU'RE GONNA GET: Limewire software please

76. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS OR GLASSES: Both

77. WHAT'S THE BEST ADVICE GIVEN TO YOU: Never lie to Mum and Dad hahaha

78. HAVE YOU EVER WON ANY SPECIAL AWARDS: MVP when we won the basketball championship in my high school..scores 26 point.

79. WHAT ARE YOUR FUTURE GOALS: Simple, be like Trump

80. WORST SICKNESS YOU EVER HAD: Pain of surgery
81. DO YOU LIKE FUNNY OR SCARY MOVIES BETTER: Both! I am a movie lover

82. ON THE PHONE OR IN PERSON: in person...
83. HUGS OR KISSES: Hugs

84. WHAT SONG SEEMS TO REFLECT YOU THE MOST: X Japan songs
85. MICHAEL JACKSON/R.KELLY: R Fuckin Kelly
86. DO YOU HAVE ANY ENEMIES: everyone has their enemy
87. WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST FEAR: failure..

88. WOULD YOU RATHER BE RICH OR FAMOUS: Rich of course, why do i have to be famous if i dont have a money? I wanna be rich without anyone notice about it. so i dont have to loan those two face fuckers nothing.

89: IF YOU DIED TOMORROW- WHO WOULD YOU LEAVE EVERYTHING TO?: my family...and my future wife.

90. IF YOU HAD 24 HOURS LEFT TO LIVE, WHO WOULD YOU SPEND THAT TIME WITH: my love

91. DO YOU WANNA DIE IN YOUR SLEEP OR A DIFFERENT WAY: sleep...

92. IF E.T. KNOCKED ON YOUR DOOR HOLDING UP A PEACE SIGN ASKING TO USE YOUR PHONE WHAT WOULD YOU DO: I would take my camera and then sell the pictures and the next morning I am Rich!

93. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU TALKED TO THE PERSON YOU LIKED? just now.

94. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS: Chi Hua Hua
95:WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL: Chi Hua Hua
96. ARE YOU AN ALCOHOLIC: Kumsi Kumsa
97. WHO SENT THIS TO YOU: Betha
98. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT PERSON: i think she's smart
99.WHEN DID YOU BECOME FRIENDS: A long time ago
100. DID YOU LIKE THIS SURVEY: Its dull and wasting my time.

Sometimes i really hate people

I’m going through one of those phases where I shut myself up at home and don’t go out, and don’t really do anything, either. I mean, socialization is overrated. My friends think I’ve been ignoring them on the internet, my parents are worried that I’ve fallen off the face of the earth, and my roommate must secretly suspect I’m a vampire or something. You know, from time to time it seems like a lot of effort to go out and meet people and chit chat - what’s the point and all? I might as well stay at home and play video games and watch dvd. At least my television isn’t always judging me, right?

I wouldn’t say I’m antisocial or anything, but I certainly can get that way at times. People are weird, man, especially at this school. I just looked up from my typing, and there’s this really skittish guy sitting opposite me who’s furtively glancing at everyone in the lab. If he wasn’t typing feverishly and reading stuff to himself, I’d guess he was perusing the great internet porn shoppe. There’s a girl sitting next to me who’s kind of cute, but I’m not going to talk to her, because I’m not creepy like that.

You know the best reason for hating everyone? By hating everyone I automatically become cooler than everyone else. The rules of despising people is that by doing it, you automatically put yourself in the position of coolness. This is awesome. Since I’m implicitly scared that they’ll think I’m not cool enough for them, I can pre-empt this by telling myself how much they suck. Which they do. Now, if you excuse me, I have to get back to my instant noodles and my drama series. Seriously, I must be like the coolest person on the earth.

100 things about women

Read this on Maxim. Some are funny, some are true, but most are just fun to read. The ones in red are applicable to most women.

100 Things You Need to Know About Women

You know not to forget her birthday and that her favorite flowers are purple tulips. But you need the complete list. Please use it responsibly. Maxim, November 2005

100. Girls enjoy always having something kind of wrong, like a headache or cramping or something. Remember: No matter how bad it sounds, she’s going to outlive you.

99. Most women will not have sex for the first time with a guy unless their legs are shaved. If your date shows up and you spot stubble, she’s trying to keep herself in line.

98. No matter how much she reassures you, if you can’t get a hard-on she assumes you’re not attracted to her.

97. Beware of your girlfriend's single party friend or gay bud. They want her to be single with them and will encourage any bad behavior as often as possible.

96. Jewelery. Now you always knkow what to get her for a last-minute gift.

95. The sight of you in your socks and underwear is the biggest turnoff in the world.

94. Never trust a girl who has no girlfriends. She doesn’t get along with other women because she’s either bat-shit crazy or just plain mean.

93. Girls who say, “I love sports!” are lying. Girls who ask you what time the game is on, without specifying which game they’re talking about, are not.

92. A random hookup is more likely to result in pregnancy, because a woman has more sex when she’s most fertile.

91. She still has all the love letters and cards from her past boyfriends.

90. Just started dating? Women want you to drive, even if it’s their car.

89. A girl would prefer to get a $100 gift from Tiffany & Co. than a $500 gift from Fortunoff. Why? Because her friends will ask where she got it.

88. “If I give you my number on Friday, Tuesday and Wednesday are your best bets to score a date. Monday is too desperate, Thursday is too late.”—Claire, 27

87. Your female coworkers are obsessed with the fact that on average they receive less pay than male counterparts—and the fact that they work less overtime and get pregnant is irrelevant to the discussion.

86. Laying a towel down over the wet spot is like putting your jacket over a mud puddle for her, you noble bastard.

85. A recent study revealed that natural blondes could be extinct in 200 years, so unless she’s Norwegian, her towhead might be bottled.

84. Sixteen percent of American men have been with a prostitute—scientific proof most women are decent in bed.

83. Women always want to believe what you’re saying is true.

82. What do women really want in bed? More blankets. They get colder than men.

81. The threesome is not about you; it’s about the two girls. If you’re lucky enough to score one with your girlfriend, enjoy sex with the other one because there’s a good chance it’ll end the relationship.

80. If women have an excuse to take a pill, they’ll take it.

79. Never trust the woman who gives you the best blow job you’ve ever had.

78. “I hate when my boyfriend is sweaty and tries to lie down on top of me or cuddle after I’ve come. Wait five minutes.”—Erin, 21

77. The average woman kisses 79 men before getting married.

76. She hates your Xbox more than she lets on. Blow her off for some gaming and she’ll soon stop wasting time on a dork like you.

75. Women who are obsessed with their dogs also like to keep their men on a short leash.

74. “Girls who buy their men lap dances and pretend to enjoy it are kidding themselves. They’re trying to keep him happy with some controlled freedom.”—Suzy, 31

73. Over the course of her life, a woman will use 10 men for every one she loves. If you lent her your car or helped her move and didn't get laid, you're one of the 10.

72. During emergencies, women are likely to remain calmer than men. Though it should be noted that inventing minor crises on a weekly basis gives them more practice.

71. “Women grow hairs in a lot of the same places that men do—lower abdomen, nipples—we just get rid of them.”—Katie, 26

70. Unless they’re lesbians, she won’t approve of your hanging out with other girls. Even if they’re ugly. And, really, even if they’re lesbians.

69. If you have something to hide, she’ll find it.

68. Eighty-five: The number of males per 100 females in Gary, Indiana, lowest male-to-female ratio of any city with a population of 100,000-plus. The highest male-to-female ratio is in Salinas, California: 114 males for every 100 females.

67. Kiss her before two dates have gone by or you’ll be “friended.”

66. They can't live without tension. Every once in a while she's gonna pick a fight with you for no reason. Accept this as a running, inevitable theme and your relationship will make a lot more sense.

65. The most painless way to end an argument: Let her win.

64. An online dating service’s survey found that a woman’s ideal man has brown hair and blue eyes.

63. In the U.S., 21 percent of women ages 18 to 59 hold out for their honeymoon.

62. A British study claims a woman’s chances of getting married drop by 40 percent for every 16-point rise in her IQ. The same increase in IQ for a man boosted his chances of getting married by 35 percent.

61. When a woman tells you her problems, she does not want you to offer solutions.

60. Women often cite manhandling of breasts as the biggest foreplay faux pas.

59. “When I’m drunk, I can’t come. Not even with a vibrator.”—Lauren, 35

58. If they're going to do it, most wives cheat between the ages of 18 and 29.

57. Most women think they’re better drivers than they are. Don’t point this out while she’s at the wheel or she’ll freak and crash.

56. Women ingest about half the lipstick they apply, which means they eat approximately one to three sticks per year.

54. A woman might say she just wants sex, but sleep with her for a while and she’ll change her tune. “I’ve known so many women who think they can pull this off, but they always develop feelings for the guy,” says Evie, 22.

53. According to the American Association of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery, Angelina Jolie’s lips were the most requested celebrity feature among all female patients in 2004.

52. Despite always complimenting another woman’s short haircut, she secretly celebrates having one less competitor, since men prefer long hair.

51. Don’t call her “cute.” In her mind it’s the same as “not vomit-inducing.” “Sexy,” OK. “Hot,” yes. “Fucking awesome,” only if she’s at least slightly buzzed.

50. Women often buy shoes a size or two small because they’re in denial about the size of their feet—which they can’t stand.

49. They dream of one day peeing in a urinal.

48. Women know where they stand looks-wise but worry about being considered cool, about which they’re unsure.

47. According to the U.S. Bureau of Statistics, 23 percent of 18- to 34-year-old women live with their parents, versus 31 percent of you losers.

46. Women want to talk dirty, but they’re afraid you won’t respect them in the morning. Reassure her that letting go in bed doesn’t make her less classy and she’ll probably go wild. Jäger helps.

45. Twenty-three percent of this magazine’s readers are women.

44. A psycho jealous girl will do anything to keep her man—including anal.

41. If she suddenly cuts her hair short, it might mean she no longer cares what you think of her. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about someone else’s opinion.

40. About half of all brides will lose a good friend over a ridiculous bridesmaid squabble.

39. It never hurts to say you're sorry, even if you don't mean it.

38. Let her beat you at something once in a while—poker, chess, Ping-Pong—and she’ll be more likely to give you what you want, like some peace and quiet.

37. Women’s public bathrooms are about three times more disgusting than men’s.

36. “At one point or another, I’ve gone through your things looking for any evidence from past relationships. I’m talking photographs, postcards, mementos, address books, diaries. If you don’t like it, get rid of this stuff before letting me in your apartment. It’s not about trust; it’s about curiosity, and it drives us crazy till it’s been satiated.”—Caroline, 28

35. Like you, girls hate nothing more than a clingy partner who needs them every eight seconds.

34. Chick rock strikes a deeply primal chord inside women while simultaneously revolting men. Just sit back and let her sing the Sarah McLachlan or Ani DiFranco song. It’s only about four minutes long.

33. The average woman owns eight bras and wears each one five times before washing. Shasta!

32. Girls will not sit on any toilet outside their own home or a five-star hotel. Everywhere else they’re hovering above the toilet in a squat.

31. Got a new girl coming over? Your (tidy) bathroom should include clean linen, a box of Puffs Plus, and several full rolls of TP.

30. “Don’t caress our faces while we’re kissing, unless you really, really, really like us.”—Rachel, 21

29. On a first date, women never order what they really want to eat.

28. Breast augmentation surgery has grown by 257 percent since 1997. The most popular size? C-cup. As if you didn’t know.

27. Gain her trust when you’re out by calling her at 10 P.M. She’ll go to bed content you’re thinking of her, even if you’re slurping Jell-O shots off some skank’s cleavage.

26. Put down the Drakkar and grab a box of Good & Plenty. Women are turned on by the scent of black licorice.

25. At least one of her friends wants to sleep with you.

24. A good but flawed man is a fixer-upper gem, and women love nothing more than home improvements.

23. Every woman is self-conscious about her ass. Tell her you love her ass and you’ll see it more often.

22. If you want more sex, tell your girl an attractive woman hit on you that day. Sixty percent of the time, it works every time.

21. More than half of surveyed females between 18 and 25 would prefer to be run over by a truck than be fat.

20. All women think they’re smarter than their partners in some significant way.

19. The more piercings she has, the more places she’ll let you put it.

18. Once in a while, let her pick the movie and don't complain about it.

17. Any good woman will tell ya, honesty is not always the best policy.

16. Chicks aren’t afraid to get kinky; you just have to have the nerve to ask.

15. Girls don’t want to date doormats. So make her proud and refuse to give up bowling night with the guys.

14. Don't take a woman to a concert you really want to see—she'll just want to leave early.

13. “Women appreciate a big penis, but having one doesn’t give you an excuse to suck at foreplay.”—Elena, 28

12. Studies show women are more attracted to “macho” guys near ovulation. The rest of the month, they’re drawn to “good providers,” otherwise known as chumps.

11. She likes one of your friends.

10. Ugly girls like to hang out with pretty girls because it makes them feel like they're more attractive. Pretty girls hang out with ugly girls for the same reason.

9. The minute she decides she’s even mildly interested in you, she starts making mental pictures of what your kids would look like and imagining her first name with your last.

8. Sixty percent of women in the United States color their hair, according to L’Oréal (who are obviously hoping they can peer-pressure the other 40 percent).

7. Dated a stripper? Keep your mouth shut, stupid.

6. Rub a sheet of medium-grade sandpaper across your face. That’s your five o’clock shadow when you kiss her. Now rub that sandpaper on your inner thigh. (Mind you, we’re not suggesting you shave.)

5. Female serial killers tend to use poison rather than guns or knives.

4. Foghat’s “Slow Ride” is not about a trip in the car. Get the hint?

3. The one breakup line she’ll never be able to argue you out of: “I’m sorry, but I no longer have feelings for you.”

2. Buying a present for your girl? She’ll hate it (and you) if she finds out you took along another woman to help pick it out.

1. You'll probably never know how many guys she's slept with. The standard lie is five. Which really means about 12. (what do they say? divide the guy's number by three but multiply the woman's by three?)

Funny ey!

A very true things about life

Why does people have to be so selfish? this i dont fully understand.
they tend to take advtange of other people`s weaknesses
as people who lives in the same world and same society we should help each other
Yet, there are still a lot of back stabber living around us.

There is a quote that i read a long time ago
"You cant force people to like/love you, But all you can do is to make yourself to be loved"
it sounds very simple and i think it is very true.

Once, people said to me that to be a better person you have to be humble.
This i dont agree with.
I am a big fan of Muhammad Ali, and i have read his book and documentary film about his amazing life. I was not a big fan of boxing before, But i think his perception of life and his courage had an impact on me.

Ali -"If You`re Great As I Am, Its very hard to be humble".
He can say that because he is "The Greatest".
but i am starting to believe his wisdom of words.

There are only two rules in this world.
1. If you are somebody (made people), everyone gonna kiss your ass that include respect. in a simple way to put it here: If you rich i am going to call you my boss, if you are broke motherfucka, fuck off and dont even think that i am going to talk with ya.

thats life...how cruel is that

2. If you are just a simply commoners, well, people wont take a notice about you. for the rest of your life you are going to be treated like shit(rubbish). Well you can try to kiss someone`s asses but it wont do any good!. Have your pride!

I have a funny story, i had a friend once said that he ought to be someone`s Dog rather than to turn himself into God. Do you guys want to know what his stupid reason?
If you go to pray and talk to God. You aint get shit!.
But if you lick some balls you`ll get a free food/drinks everytime you are with him/her

WTF? in my mind i said. Where is your fuckin PRIDE you dumb fuck!
just because you want to be treated all the time you lost your fuckin mind!
What happen with people nowadays?
I started to believe that its impossible to find someone who is sincere and true to theirselves

I rather have one or two friends and they are real and speak whatever they believe and not being fake!.
I dont need a bunch of hypocrites to be around me to entertain my ass. yet, they have a bad intention behind their mind.

Why am i writting this thing? i know all of you must have had experience this kind of circumstances as well. To be honest i am sick and tired of those kind of people!
I met a lot of hypocrites during my early year. trust me!. i know what i am saying!.
Every where, Every corner, Every side, wherever...there are still a lot of hypocrites!.

As i said before, there is nothing you can do to change their attitude. All you have to do is just simple, "Stay Away and dont make friends with them" .
lock yourself inside otherwise you will be in a lot of problem if you stick with those people.


"Never judge a book by its cover rang a hell of a bell to my mind"
There 2 difference between Asian and Westerner!
Asian- At first they are not going to trust you and get suspicious easily with you. but at the end after you show some prove and sincerity they are going to have a faith. Thats Asian thinking

Westerner- They are going to trust you at first and at the end they are not going to trust you, if you made them pissed by your attitude or whatever!.

to conclude, Asian- Suspicious first and then trust you!, Westerner- Trust you at first and ban you for life is the next action!

for my personal choice i rather make friends with International people, why? because they are open minded! and definitely not a gossiper nor back stabber. If you made mistake everyone gonna curse your ass in Indonesia and will assume that you are not an ass! No second chance mate! fuckin unfair!. this is how it works in Indo Society, once you fuck up you will be thrown into a lonely world!.


For information, i`m not trying to degrade Asian, but my Asian definition is my people of my country. I am not talking about Japanese, Korean, Thai. etc.
All i am saying, Asian=Indo"fuck"nesian!.
I am not being racist or whatsoever But i am Indonesian and i know how my people thinks! i can dig their shit!. To be honest i am shame to be Indonesian!. I am not saying that all Indonesian are shit but majority of them are hypocrites!.

I dont have to say their name, but look around you..and ask youself " Are they for real?"
thats that all i got to say!

History Lesson

Have a history teacher explain this----- if they can.

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost their children while living in the White House.

Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Now it gets really weird!

Lincoln 's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln.

Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.

Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.

John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.

Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.

Now hang on to your seat.

Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford.'
Kennedy was shot in a car called ' Lincoln' made by 'Ford.'

Lincoln was shot in a theater and his assassin ran and hid in a warehouse.
Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and his assassin ran and hid in a theater.

Both and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

And here's the kicker...

A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

Creepy huh?

Romantic Countries in dA World!!

H.O.L.L.A.N.D. - Hope Our Love Lasts And Never Dies

I.T.A.L.Y. - I Trust And Love You.

L.I.B.Y.A. - Love Is Beautiful; You Also.

F.R.A.N.C.E. - Friendships Remain And Never Can End

C.H.I.N.A. - Come Here.. I Need Affection.

B.U.R.M.A. - Between Us, Remember Me Always

N.E.P.A.L. - Never Ever Part As Lovers.

I.N.D.I.A. - I Nearly Died In Adoration

K.E.N.Y.A. - Keep Everything Nice, Yet Arousing.

C.A.N.A.D.A. - Cute And Naughty Action that Developed into Attraction

K.O.R.E.A. - Keep Optimistic Regardless of Every Adversity

E.G.Y.P.T. - Everything's Great, You Pretty Thing

M.A.N.I.L.A. - May All Nights Inspire Love Always

P.E.R.U. - Phorget Everyone... Remember Us.

T.H.A.I.L.A.N.D - Totally Happy. Always In Love And Never Dull

A small truth to make our lives 100%

if
A B C D E F G H I J K L M
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is equal to
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
then

hardwork = H+A+R+D+W+O+R+K = 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98% only
knowledge = K+N+O+W+L+E+D+G+E = 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96% only
love = L+O+V+E = 12+15+22+5 = 54% only
luck = L+U+C+K = 12+21+3+11 = 47% only
(aint most of us think this is the most important???)

then whaT maKes 100% ?
is iT moneY? ...... no
leaDersHip? ...... no

eVery problem has a solution, only if
We perhaps cHange ouR aTTitude. to gO t0 The top, To thaT 100%.

wHat we Really neeD tO Go fuRtheR, alil'biT moRe.......

attitude = A+T+T+I+T+U+D+E = 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%
iT Is our aTTituDe toWards life anD woRk thaT makes ouR liFe 100%

Every one who dares to dream to be extraordinary, will become One

in making money:

accept the fact, that once u know u can make money, greed will come to haunt you.
your pride is unleashed and one night victory can kill the humility in you. get a grip on yourself you never know how ambitious you are, how cruel you can be
until u taste how good it is to be on top of the world

never tell yourself that u've made it to the top
because there is no such thing as an overnight success
tonight you might be a billionaire and in a speed of a blink, you realised that u have lost everything that u earned

your true measure of capability is not defined by how much money you have in your bank account, now u can be totally broke now
but you know that tomorrow you are going to turn the table arround

no matter how genius you are
no matter how brilliant the business idea tat u have
no matter how confidence you are that one day you are going to conquer the world
if you never taste how it feels like to be at the most undignified position
if you never know the term submission to the authority
if you never learn the term dedication in doing the least important job
just screw yourself because you lose the first step already

in relationship:

the key in relationship is time
learn as much, while you still have the time
dont trust every word that your loved one say until they are being proven overtime
dont declare love if you have not seen your lover at his or her lowest turning point,or the "before" version
dont dwell in toxic relationship, eventhough you still love the person, time will heal
it can be the right person, it is not always the right time

in friendships:

classify your friends in groups
those whom you allow to see your outer skin
those whom you allow to see you heart
those whom you pour your heart into
those for fun (Hi-Bye Friends)
those for life (Soul Mate)

in studying:

screw your ego, dont pursue education JUST BECAUSE
you think that a particular degree from a particular university will earn you an acknowledgement from your society
your worth is just as far as how much you value your self
pursue your passion and by doing that you know you accomplish the true education

in the search for truth:

keep searching until you have no more doubt in your faith
search with desperation and obsession, i'm serious!
once you find the truth, hold unto it.
keep believing and following eventhough the road is rocky
i can testify that GOD never fails me yesterday, today and tomorrow

in enjoying life:

what's the point of having million bucks in your bank account but you are not spending it for your personal pleasure?
Asians, learn from Westerners, will ya!! splurge urself if you dont want to get heart attack too soon

in treating yourself:

love yourself, dont be a narcist though, respect yourself, value yourself highly
the way you treat yourself will be a measure on how others will treat you
if you have a low self-esteem
you are more likely to accept bad treatment from others
because your security comes from other people recognition
you deserve to be treated with respect by everyone and anyone
but in return, treat others with respect and show everyone your kind appreciation

walk with your chest up, look at other people in the eye and speak up your mind
dont look down on other people, even the weakest one has a story to tell
but dont think that other people are too high to reach
even Kings have soft side that you can touch

Last but not least, live your life to the fullest

All She Need

vAlenCiA

I miss you, it hurts so bad
every thought of you consumes me, makin' me miss you
every single moment

I feel you when u aren't even there
This distance between us is so unfair
I need u with me, I need ur touch
I want u so bad, I miss u so much
my weakness for you, is predictably growing stronger

I don't wanna be selfish
I don't wanna scheme
but i can't tell you to come back now
I'm not going to do that

I just wish i had you here, had you in sight
I wonder that u're thinking
or even miss me
but all i know is i miss you, and it's you all i need

written by Valencia on 25th August 2005

Blogger Evolution

When i mean blogger, i meant the person doing the blogging... aka ME.

Or in the context of this rather unfriendly blog entry, that guy out there who so desperately wants to impress others.


Not unlike me... But i'm less ugly in every way.


There was a point in time when i first started blogging where it meant everything to me to have people reading what i write.


I religiously checked my webcounter to see how many people visited my blog, how many of them liked what i wrote, how many chose to leave a comment.


Then suddenly...


Gone... no more of that desire. Now i don't even bother to correct my webcounter that's been down for months.


I no longer care if anyone reads this anymore. What's important now is that i wrote it.


HOWEVER!


There is this guy out there who so DESPERATELY wants his blog to be read that he publishes his blog address everywhere!!!


I mean... What the hell?!. Everyone who sees it know you're putting it there with the sole purpose of attracting readers.


BUT NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!


You leave it on every single damn website that has a forum which you participate! Like come on!!!


This just says a lot about why you're blogging... You want to be known. You want recognition. You want to be seen as intellectual...


Basically you want to be known as the person who ISN'T the true you...


... and all these is for???


Your insatiable appetite for SEX, that's what!


It may seem appealing to anyone, but we know you and we know what you've been doing and what you've done before. I can even list out exactly what your steps are!


1) Get some girl to read your blog
2) Make her think you're intellectual and a great guy
3) Impress her with your phoney bullshit till she leaves a comment
4) Communicate with her and get her contact
5) Meet her and impress her even if she looks like a giraffe
6) SCREW HER... again and again...


Why?!?! Because you don't have enough money from your waitering job to go to King Cross and pay for fuck... So get a FUCKFRIEND to keep fucking for free.


Ho ho ho!! So it sounds way too ridiculous...


Well if all goes well for you, then very good. Have your fun while it lasts...


But my advice for you?


CAN'T YOU JUST GROW UP?!?!?!

dedicated to some fuckers out there, you know who you are!

My small shrine for X Japan

The story of X and X Japan is a long and complicated one. The introduction that I'm about to give is just to cover roughly the 15 years of X life.


Who are they?

X Japan was one of the most influential Japanese rock bands of all time. If you ask around, chances are most people would say that they are the founder of JRock and Yoshiki, the leader, was the father of visual kei. I dare not say that this is completely true, though I believe it is nearly there ^^ Why? Pardon me if Im wrong, but as far as I know, X was one of the first of very few Rock bands which managed to get mainstream audience and not just went Indies. I remember during their time there was a band called, BOOWY or B'z or Buck Tick *can't remember which, all starts with a 'B'* which was also quite popular. *shrugs* anyone out there knows about it?

Yeah, continuing with my story, X Japan, which original name was just 'X', was founded in 1982. However, it was not until 1986 that the two original founders, Yoshiki and Toshi, managed to get permanent members, hide and Pata and Taiji, and started to be heard more. X's music was highly aggressive according to the standard of the mainstream audience at that time, thus they were having difficult time getting recording deal. Once they did *read Yoshiki's biography for more information* they started to get more and more audience and their songs soon were found on major top charts which usually covered the JPop scene only.

In 1992, X held their first Tokyo Dome concert, Hamettsu ni Mukatte, which is also known as 'On the Verge of Destruction' concert. What's so amazing about this concert is that it is the first ever concert to be held in Tokyo Dome. Before X, Tokyo Dome were never been used as a concert venue, thus X became more famous because of this.

The concert was immediately followed by departure of the band's talented bassist, Taiji *read Taiji biography for more info* in around February. X recruited a new bassist in August 1992, Heath had joined the band. At the same time, X changed its name to X Japan. The reason was because they wanted to go international and break the US market. At that time there was already a band in the US which was also called X, so they changed the name to X Japan to avoid confusion.

X Japan continued to grow and become famous. They managed to capture the mainstream audience with their songs. However, they announced the disbandment of X Japan in 1997. The vocalist, Toshi, left the band in April due to some unknown reason. The band held their last concert, The Last Live in Tokyo Dome, December 1997 and it was a highly sad one. The concert was said to be a replica of the Dahlia Tour in 1995, but I believe that the Dahlia Tour did not have the crying atmosphere as The Last Live had.

X Japan disbandment was planned to be a temporary. Yoshiki wrote X's songs for Toshi's voice. Now that Toshi was gone, he and hide were planning to find a new vocalist and re-form X Japan in the year 2000.

However, a highly shocking incident happened in 1998. hide was found dead, hanging on a towel on a doorknob at his apartment in the morning of 2nd May. Yoshiki's dream of reuniting X Japan was dashed. Not only that, he grieved so much that he cut himself off from the media for one whole year, working behind the scene and did not plan to appear on the front stage again. hide's death brought many fans hysterical, there were some who committed suicide and many who tried unsuccessfully to do so.

X Japan had become a legend. It was like as if they laid the foundation of JRock. They had influenced the JRock world in a way that nobody has ever done. Even though they had disbanded years ago, their music is still alive. Yoshiki is working hard to release more X Japan things; the latest was the rare Art of Life DVD. They continue to attract new fans. As of myself, I was introduced to X Japan in 2002 and fell in love with them immediately.

New news

I will be going home this December, I had ask a permission to Medina manager for having a holiday, she approved it. Yeah! Cant wait no more to meet my dear.

School Project is going to be tough this semester since this is my last chance to get 70 WAM, Me n my group member are doing Blood donation thing. Hopefully no obstacle gonna face us.

November is coming soon, which mean that i still have 1 month and a half to be in Sydney, then i`ll have a good holiday for couple of weeks, though i have to study when i will be in Medan.

Why am i so happy?
My parent wont allow me to go back since the currency of Rupiah to Dollar is so high. they wanted me to work in Medina and get a good money instead of going back. After several persuading, i convinced them that i really want to go back and they miss me so much. I believe that since the Indonesian Government has change their policy in the gambling n stuff which affects my Dad`s job and financial problem. Alll i have to do is to work hard and earn some money and take some Australian Dollar to use it when i will be in Medan.

I feel so bad for my parent, i hope i wont be so demanding and ask for the money for them, I am 21 years old and almost 22 next January. I got to be more independent.
Things between me and my girl friend going well. nothing much to say. She said that she`s going to wait for me till i am graduated.

Anyhow, This blogging thing is useful finally, I never thought that this blogging has nothing to do with Communication study. But what i found is that this semester. Russel our Lecturer is teaching how to blog which is not a new thing for me. Since i have been blogging for about a year.

Why Did i blog at first?
Well, I blog becoz I had a girlfriend that i had been together with for about 3 years. She left me heart broken, and honestly this blogsite is dedicated for her. But now it turn out to be my school project hahahah. Right now me and my ex is doing okay. A very close mate sometime that led to a jealousy to my current girlfriend. But i finally realized that Valencia (Cia2) is a lot better girlfriend that my ex.
I have no regret of losing my ex.

This is the new beginning of my life!
Till December then...

point blank

I already got my result for the third semester.. quite unhappy with what i achieved. WAM 68 overal.. i need to get 70 fuck.. hope doing great for the fourth semester. Yesterday i enrolled everything in the morning class hopefully i`ll be more self managed and well organized in morning class..

15th December got to be my choice to go back to Medan, i`ll be in Medan for 15 days i guess or so.. Cant wait anymore to meet my cia.. eveything will be decided after we have been together.. i`m pretty quite sure its gotta be fun..hopefully..

I have given Be my notes, the funny thing is that.. she`s now in sadness, my bro and she always hook up together to talk about their circumstances in their relationships..

Work, been so fuckin tired during this holiday, work 20 hours more in a week. got a good paid, but the tax is so unfuckinbelievable, hopefully to get it in June 2006, i am planning to cut down my shift though in order to doing good in my final semester, but the problem is that my parent has a financial problem. they said, just try to be independent though i got a job. Yes, the thing is that i have a lot of bills to pay, fuck damn it. but hopefully i`m going to survive.. no more shopping n shit for a while. i was thinking to quit cigarette as well just to save more.

My relationship with Cia is going well recently, she really shows her passion, for instance like, she went nuts if i didnt reply her message, she`ll call me until i pick up the phone.. at least i am happy being with her.. although its only a long distance.

Friendship, Dre, Dru n others facing a lot of problems with their family+financial problem... they pretty much in a very low spirit at the moment.. Had an argument with them. because they said that i was changed a lot, and seem so cocky. Well it doesnt mean that i dont care about them..it just that i am busy with work and shit.. its true that i am happy at the moment.. so when we were chatting in msn.. of course we always talk shit n joke.. but the odd thing is that.. they cant accept a joke(insulting one), but they always say such things to me that i have to deal with that.. so unfair and childish..i thought they were cool and they already knew me for a decade..so why bothers if its only a joke? sometimes i dont understand those people who are in a low spirit under their circumstances..the rules.. if you dont wanna get insulted...dont start cursing, cause i`ll never start a bullshit otherwise they start it first..
dealo?

thats all about it then.. hopefully things wil get better to my friends..

break and broken

Third semester had gone.. just finished the exam on monday..it was only 1 though..and its pretty straight forward question..aint got nothing to worry no more. the only thing that i can do is only just to work maybe..
i just bought a new ipod nano and new mobile phone panasonic vs3..
currently i am broke.. and having a long break..and if you can feel my heart my dear cia2.. my heart broken into pieces... the trauma..the pain.. the memory wont fade away?
is there something wrong with me?

if i am a really grown up person or matured kind of guy..i wont think about it..at least it wont be matter no more to me.. as long as you love me totally..but what in the blue..i am still doubt about you..

I always have a thought..how wonderful it was..if you never cheated on me..
how wonderful.. if i never found out..
Right now i am so scared to give you my heart..even though u tried ur bery best to convinced me that u got nothing to do with him no more..but still.. i believe that it was because.. he stop pursuing you.
i believe that..if someday in the future..if he keep pursuing you...its gonna be hard for you to reject him..if someday..i turn into asshole..you`ll be in his arm again..what i meant by asshole is that,... i will never forget and kept saying same shit and bringing up the same stuffs every single time

right now..i dont have faith to myself..that i can totally.. forget what u did to me.
it hurts like hell.. i became weak ass muthafucka..i hate this kind of feeling..
i love you so much dear.. you are the reason that i can move on ..i can face a lot of circumstances by myself..
i want to show you that..i deserve you..

by the time goes by..someday somehow..i will tell the story from the beginning..not based on how it was happend..but from the way how i remember it..

i know that..till today..you still have a slight feelings for him..i aint stupid or dumb..
i can feel it though..that u are not in love with me..
but the thing that i wanna do right now is that..i want to stop calling you everyday..
so you know that i can let you go..i know its hard and seems impossible for me to do so.
but i`ll try no matter how hard it is..

i really hope that you can find someone better than me..
that can accept you for who you are..or were..
someone that wont give a head about ur past..
simply..someone greater than me ..
this is the least thing that i can do..

I love you too much..my expectation is higher than anything that i ever want in this world..
but things has changed since you were busted..till then...
nite..my cia..

There and That......

kurang lebih udah 3 bulan saya mengenal cia cia.. akhirnya semua drama udah terbongkar dari apa ketulusan dia selama ini. Jumat tanggal 2..hari pertama kerja saya, i called her when i got home and suddenly a guy answer the phone and says, I am cia`s boy friend. at first i thought it was just a joke. I said stop playing cause i dont have the mood. i am so fuckin tired, And Kyo told cia to tell me on da phone and tell me everything. but she didnt say a thing and i start to worried, The joke became a serious problem, and my heart was beaten and shaking like shit, I drop of my tears for the heart ache for the dissappointment that i got.

How could she do that to me? since i already gave my heart since from the start.
I couldnt understand why did she keep the relationship with him, afterwards Kyo took over cia`s mobile phone. the incidents was occured in Yenny`s home. After Cia left to her house...her friends was trying to calm me down..and 1 thing..i hate her friends... acting like shit when they were talk to me... dont fuckin hope that i will forgive them..my heart was break into pieces...because of her disloyalty..and unhonesty....Now my mind is swimming so hard..
I am asking to myself.. Does she really deserve my love.. while she was cheating behind my back..although that things has revealed by itself..still i am so unsatisfied..What the hell did i do wrong...that made her chose him rather than me..

I need time to rethink over and over again.. about the matters.. Does she ever really like me? does she ever consider how i felt?, could she be trusted anymore?, Will she ever take me seriously for what i had told her?, Lord..i am so pissed that i was cheated twice with the same heart ache.

I talked with kyo as well..and he told me everything..and he was heart broken as well..because he was intended to divorce with her wife..and be with cia..and..i am totally sure that cia will choose to be with him rather than me..if its happend that way..What a dumb ass i am..

At the moment.. cia is asking for a second chance from me..and the funny thing is that..i dont even understand what does she want?. is it a boy fren girl fren relationship or just like used to be? because she doesnt admit us...to kyo or others.. i was deceived by her words..Should i give her another chance or not?

Cia told me today as well..that She and Kyo met at sun plaza..and Kyo ask her...if two of us standing right here.. which one will you choose to be with?.. kyo says..if you keep silent..it mean you choose to be with him.. and cia kept silent... Cia told me..that she has chosen to be with me.. but her feeling for him is still there...cia still love him...but cia cares about me..and put a lot of hope for me.. i dont even know whether its true..and pure as she says it.. cause..no matter how hard i am gonna believe her...it just that i am scared to death..that she`s going to cheat behind my back again.

Am i gonna get hurt again in the future? if i give her a second shot?
Am i gonna be able to forget those pain? those memory of scar?
my heart has been scrath too much...and i am not sure if i am able to let it go
no medicine to cure it... it just too great.. the pain
if i couldnt forget those memory.. i will leave her for sure...
this is the cause and effect of the dishonest...
my heart wont be the same again..i will easily get hurt..just by the thing that u will upset me
i wish that...i will never fall into the same misery no more

Dull for sure!!!

Each minute feels like an hour, each hour feels like a day, each day feels like a month, each month feels like a year. Damn... i cant settle down on this shit..just want to graduate as soon as possible. and do the right thing.

Although there are still a lot of circumstances and consideration about my future in Sydney. i ought to have a break for a while. just to take things easy and slow down. 2 weeks aint enough.. i need more than a month. Time is all i want right now.

I have been couch potato all this week, Third semester is the shitest thing.. aint nothing to do, Even on monday i dont even have a class. What a long week to kill, on the other hand. i heard that casino in Medan is all closing down because of the Kapolda shit is the new guy that hates gambling and any illegal shit. as a result, My father aint got income for this month. he told me to save some money. Well i feel bad as well.. thats why i tend to be at home. which is so damn bored and life is so fuckin dull!.

I had spent a lot of money on telephone bill. i am afraid that i wont be able to call cia.. for the next couple of weeks. i believe she wont mind, she even said that it is alright for her to go to the warnet to just have chat with me. How nice is that?. She is the only good thing at the moment. She is the one that totally understand me, care for me, and potentially will love me more than anything in this world.

I might get a job though to cover up my expenses of those bills and stuffs. I wish that on December i will be in Medan to celebrate a X mas and New Years eve with her. i wish both of us will connected each other. not only in da phone, but also in the real conversation. eye 2 eye.

there is nothing much to say, but next month Cindy will celebrate her birthday. i was invited as well. but i am not sure whether i should go or not. it seems awkward and i dont even know how`s cia gonna feel deep down inside.. althought she told me that she is alright with it. but to be honest i dont want her to celebrate her ex bf birthday. which is close to Cindy`s birthday.

Cia.. if you read this....i just want you to know that you had me at hello. You complete me..i never felt like this before.. its a weird and an odd feeling eyy.. there is no words to describe how i feel. even though we separated by an ocean and thousand of miles of island. i trust u deeply. u showed me ur love and ur caring that i could see. u convinced me that i am the only one that u need. I couldnt wait to hug you and to love you totally cia..

I wish that i wont be in the same hole as i did before. i hope that you are different than other women that i ever known.

Cia.. all i can say right now is that i miss you so much..
Last but not least.. i am falling for you so deeply..


dedicated to cia..
from co...

Who is she? and Where is she?

A few weeks ago was the best moment between me and cia cia, finally i found someone that could replace my emptiness in ma heart. i never thought that she will like me as well. as these day we oftenly have a conversation, I was surprised by her personality that could totally understand me. What do i know about her.. aight.. She`s not that Rich type of girl like my ex before, Cia is very simple girl, with a simple kind of thinking. thats what i like about her, i believe she wont give me a headache. The funniest thing that about me and her is that.. whenever we talked on da phone.. we had like the feeling of not letting the phone off, it just seems like there is no tomorrow. funny ey, We talked a lot about stuffs, i`m just hoping that this feeling wont go away.. i hope it will stay the same until when i am with her.

Well, i think she`s the best personality kind of chix that i ever want, She aint geek for sure and she`s so fine... I could say that this is kind of sad ass pathetic story first love at first sight.. i dont wanna admit it.. but its true.. that i was interested first because of her outlook. The weird things though that everyday.. i am thinking about her.. like my mind went nuts. I dont know why, we have been knowing each other for 4 weeks, but our relationships seem just like 4 years.
everything went fast, but all i can wish is that our relationships will last long.. I dont wanna jump in the same hole again, i want this relationships will be the last one. I am so tired and pissed everytime i get hurt.

I wish that i wont call her this week, school shit starts to get really busy, i am gettin lazy and lazy. What is wrong with me!.. Damn, All i can do is just to hold my curiosity, Things went so quickly, I hope... everything will goes like i want..

What is i gonna do?

i miss home so much at the moment....things are pretty fucked up in Sydney, i wish i could have the moment when i was with my friend back in Medan. I missed all of them,
the school is pretty boring.. i couldnt wake up.. but i still managed to come to the class everyday, a lot of shits coming up.. i need to focus..while myself still feel uncontent about study. but i got to do it whether i like it or not!.

the only good thins about me is that i am getting close with cia cia, i called her and i missed her all the time, she is the only one who can talk, understand me. i finally fall for her, i am so into her and she did give me a feedback as well. the only thing that bothers me a lot is that her past. it annoys me a lot because everyone thought that i look like his ex bf, which i hate to admit it. what the fuck was that!. even though i already know her for about couple of weeks. but we both felt that we already knew each other for years.. we are so connected.in everything.. even her hobbies, what she likes, or what she hates.. everything is just exactly the same as mine.

I couldnt think about getting her because i dont wanna be unfair.. we both are separeted by a long distance..i dont wanna hurt her. both of us had the same trauma of a bad relationships. 1 thing for sure... She`s real fine.. She`s so pretty in a real person rather in a pic that she put in her friendster. I know that she wanted to forget her past.. by trying to open herself to me. she hasnt been in a relationships for 6 months already. but i have a lot of things swimming in my head. i couldnt make a decision.. i know that she likes me a lot. from the way she talks to me..from her attention to me.. i am so flattered...but i dont wanna hurt her..its not because i still couldnt forget about Cindy. but it just simply that i dont wanna ruin everythings or jump into the same hole again. I dont wanna get hurt..and i dont wanna hurt her as well..

i couldnt sleep... i drank 2 vodka today.. i feel so pissed..i am not sure what that fuck is going on with me.. but i just wanna think all over again..but i really miss her..i wanna hear her voice..
later...

Side Story...

Single, Lonely and Bored.. this is exactly how i feels at the moment. There is nothing much i have done in here.. sleep, eat, sleep, eat, go to school..bla bla..thats it..
For the first time... i am not happy in Sydney. Thinking back. i still remember that when my parents didnt allowed me to come in Sydney.. i was like.. mad, angry, pissed.. and etc.. when i left Medan.. i felt great..Now i feel Medan is more nice than here...i am suppose to be happy in here.. but i guess this is because of the loneliness...

I was having fun a lot.. i met a lot of new friends when i was in Medan.. and i cant stop thinking about cia cia.. What is i gonna do?..oh Lord... why must she so damn gorgeous..!..grrr..
i dont wanna talk bullshit here.. but for real..she`s the best chix i ever met.. (Outlook).
No need to be curious about her.. cause she`s quite similar look like Nakama Yukie (Japanese Actress)

I already enroled for my new time table.... i have a long weekend..cause i dont have a class on Monday at all.. how suck is that!.. but at least i know what to do on the weekend..
Lenny.. the Surabaya girl called me the other day.. ..and i met her in the school.. Well to be honest.. i am not interested with her anymore.. although we talked on the phone..but i dont feel anything special no more about her.. cause she`s a fuckin liar.. Btw..compared with Cia cia.. it was like.. 100:1..

Hopefully this december i will be in Medan.. although its only 2 weeks... I wanna meet her.. damnn.. i havent call her yet till today..even an sms.. But i will call her soon...
Well i did promised that i wanna tell you guys about my ex girl.. or you may call... my loved one.. Suddenly.. i am not that bothered anymore..by her dissapperance.. I finally realized that.. in her society.. she was trying to make me look bad by telling her frens (used to be my fren as well). that i was an asshole or bla bla bla.. but she forgive me..bla bla bla.. that is why i finally understood.. why the hell should Catherine said that you are the most patience and forgiveness person in the world.. Well..for the information.. fuck that shit..

You are such a two face person..if you really do understand my circumstances you wouldnt say anything bad about me.. Well i admited that i did a huge mistake.. I am not trying to be an Angel or whatsoever that reflects Saint or God. but i am simply a human being..i got feeling as well..not only you!.. i couldnt even believe that u have such a big mouth..or maybe you are so desperate for love? care? or anything that will gives a benefit for you.. or maybe you want all of the poeple in this world on your side?.. how selfish are you!

You even said that you wanted to be a friend.. but from the way you acted.. i dont fuckin think so.. I hope that we wouldnt meet for a long time.. I dont wanna care about you no more.. after all.. from the way you acted, talked, smiled, and everything.. i felt nothing no more..

finally i have a conclusion on my mind..that you are so fake.. so pretending... i am sick of that shit.. i couldnt take the shit no more.. even i still care about you today.. (If you really realized how i care about you..and appreciated for what i have done).. but i chose not to know anything about you no more..
aight.. so go have some fun.. out there.. and go fuck everyone you dating with. cause you aint gonna enjoy that moment.. anymore..next year.. cause ur mum gonna send ur big ass in Medan.. so good luck for the sex.. and if you read this..dont say that i am not respecting you..just think about yourself.. have you ever respect me? even i already changed for you.. for the efforts and everything.. have u ever thought about that? Hell no!..

I can guarantee your ass.. that i am going to leave you..for a long long time.... i dont want to involve shit with you no more.. dont wanna know anything about you.. i shut my ear.. and i shut my vision when i saw. you.. the point is.. Get the fuck out from my life!.

I am so pissed if i had the thought what you have done to me.. but thank Lord.. because of you too..finally i met someone....someone better than you, hotter than you, smarter than you..and everything than you.. Hell yeah..if you doubt about me..well screw you.. and if you said that i wont be with her.. well fuck you too..

I feel sorry for you..and you know what the funny things? i dont want to turn back time no more..for what i did.. ..God Bless You..cause i dont wanna bless your greedy fat ass..( written when i was in a bad mood, didnt mean it though)

Medan....

Aight this is my first post..after a long of holiday i enjoyed in Medan.. so many good and bad things to tell.. i had 3 weeks of Casanova life when i was in Medan.. chix chix chix .. is all my story about..but first. before i go further.. this is how it goes at the beginning..

26th of May, I met Dre finally after approx 1 year.. he was in medan for only 3 days.. the first day and my second day in medan.. i spent it all with him.. Oh Lord.. we had so much fun.. there was a funny story in sushi tei where i think Dre too much, where as related to his circumstances.
I never realized how bad is it.. until Dre had told me.. To be frankly. i am so sad.. by the fact his family and him got to flea somewhere to avoid this matter.. This is another reason why Dre couldnt accompany me..

after Dre went back to Jakarta.. i felt so lonely.. fuck.. i have no male frens.. but slowly for sure.. i met someone really special.. it all began when Siz K introduced me to her chix fren.. there was like 6 girls.. playing pool in the Shoot.. but only 1.. of them were really shinning.. charming.. and etc.. i was so fuckin interested or u may say..i am so into her.. that much.
Well i was playing a pool with Siz and suddenly they came over.. and play into the next table of ours.. i am not trying to be cocky..but i reckoned that she was checking me out..
and my guess was right.. Coz when they were like 4 girls sitting on the couch.. She said that i look like her ex boy friend..( What the hell?)..

Anyway her name is Cia cia...i like her name.. but the bottom line is.. Her outlook is defintely an A..after we went back.. i was like.. asking Siz K her phone number..but she wont give it to me..Damn..u Siz K... but 2 days before i left.. she gave me.. and The fuck can i do in 2 days..
but at least.. i talked with her on the phone like 4 hours..
i promised her that i will come back on Dec.. Well. she always said that " Why did u contact me so late?.. ( i called her one day before i left).. and i just said.. that.. Siz K wont give it to me..until i pho her..hehe..

Cia cia asked me.. why do u want to get to know me?.what makes u do so?..
and you know what.. i said.. because you were so charming when i saw you.. Damn.. i was stupid.. i shouldnt be so honest.. hahaha..

But it was all fun... and i believe that she might be the one.. i couldnt say nothing bad about her outlook, no hidden handicap.. absolutely Wow..i realized that my ex Cindy.. was nothing compared with her.. from the outlook
and i started to not give a shit about her no more..

but dont get me wrong.. i do care about her.. but from the way she acted.. i am getting tired.. so it is all the best for all of us..I hang out with a lot of different chix everyday.. some of them i did avoid..or make an excuses.. cause damn man.. i got no male frens.. that the saddest part... i lost my man hood.. for a while. everyone might thought that i am a Gay!..fuck that shit.

There were some potential girl that i might have connection with.. but because of Cia cia. (i met her in the second week of my holiday in Medan.. ) i have forgotten the rest. But shockingly that most of them are so fine..me myself couldnt believe that i live like Casanova. in Medan.
I met a lot of Old frens. such as Honey and Siz K.. they all said that i look so different.. much more like Vietnamese, Gay lar.. whatsoever..i am so tired of that shit.. but i reckoned that it is all because of my hair..style..( Way too long).

Anyway the good news is that i passed all of my subjects for the second semester.. i am so proud and happy of myself..cause i thought that i might fail something this semester.. but.. Thank Lord.. I through...
Well right now i am already in Sydney.. though that my body is right here..but my heart is belong to Medan.. i wonder..is it because of her? man.. i never liked someone before for a long time like this.. well i did love Jules the first time i saw her.. or you can say like drama romantic scene.. first love at the first sight.. but this time is so different..
Coz both of us.. me n her.. looked at each other.. ( Dont say that i think too much). cause when Siz K called her..say that i am so interested with her.. she woke up and listen to what she said.. well at least she remembered me. how i look.. and etc..

For Cindy.. in the middle of forgiveness and hateness. honestly if i think back.. how we were.. i was so sad.. and hurt so much.. i wanted to forgive you totally.. but when i was thinking what have u done to me.. i wanna hate you forever and ban you from my life..
but i believe that by the time goes by.. i will not give a damn no more about you..
cause finally i realized that u are not that perfect like i thought before..
I dont wanna close my heart because what you had done.. i wanna get life..start my new life.
and i finally can see that when i was in Medan.. hanging out with my frens.. and met someone special.. is all the beautiful things that i need in my life..

I wanna thank my parents for giving me this opportunity to be here. as well.. without them.. i wont face such problems that i had faced. this is all the examination before i get into the real world.. of competition.. Thank God that i am doing fine.. and seriously.. i wanna go back to Medan .. i am not satisfied yet with the fun and joy i had with my new frens.. and especially..i wanna get to know Cia... Long distance relationship is a bullshit..
i will work my ass off to get her.. .she is defintely an A..

Back to to the start

another 3 days and i am going to be in my hometown. Lovely!. however tomorrow is my final exam in advertising major COM 209, to be honest i didnt study that hard, but i have made a notes to be read later. It`s not that hard though, but for the next day examination about idelogy is the shittest!. i gotta to prepare my ass for it.

Last night endru,dre, donny was having a party in Jakarta. i found out today from Dru, that Dre got into a fight with someone in the Pub, It was not a big fight thank lord, But i couldnt believe that they got into a fight because of stupid and very small problems. Dre if you read this.. Damn you.. you shouldnt got into the fight.. i blame endru for putting up the fire.

I am excited to go back to Medan after all. but i am worried that my trip this time might be result in the reverse way than i expected before. Estel is getting bored i guess waiting for Dre and Me, i am kinda in a bad shape nowadays, i sleep more than 10 hours each day.. no fuckin clue what went wrong with my body and my mind.

Any how, i have a very interesting topic about fortune teller recently, as like all of the majority chinesse people in my hometown. ( they believe in such things like paranormal, etc). my mum told me what she heard from the "Kwa Mia" about my future ahead. to be honest i was affected by those comment. but now i aint give a fuck no more.. isnt it gonna be stupid if what the "Prick" says gonna happend in my future!. It wont happend fuck no!..
The good thing is that, i knew it now. so i will do any fuckin thing to prove myself that i aint like he says. I was thinking myself if someone could really read our future. he wont do it for money, and he wont be in this world anymore. he would be the same position as God. so in my conclusion they all just a scum of people who are trying so hard to manipulates people mind. because once you got into their circle. you`ll stick there for a long time. They are just a bum who are desperately looking for customer to get their bill paid. Fuck em!.

I was so mad recently because of the stupid group work that i had. Thank Lord its done, next fuckin semester no more indo fuck nesia people. i`ll choose a better group member, How could i believe that fuck face my Group Leader. he gave me fuckin 3 out of 5. ok before i explain and tell the story. i need all of you to believe me this time.
I did my best in the group work!. the score that i got from him is so fuckin unfair. what the fuck is wrong with you fuckZ!. i am so wasted!. the reason i got mad because the other member of my group that i think is lamer than me. got a better mark!. You call it Fair and balanced. Well fuck you and take that result n mark and stick em straight up your ass. cause i aint give a fuck no more.. i have had enough of this bullshit. Thank God that people i shared this story with could support me and understand me. they fuckin knew and saw me in the fuckin library just to do the stupid paper work. For my Group leader..fuck you!.. loser!.

All i wanna to accomplish rite now is just to finish and pass all of my subject for this semester examination. After that, i could go back with a clear mind and with a good mood. On Wednesday, Sho and my brother will send me to the airport. For Sho, he is the only good fren of mine since i was in Sydney, I promised him in the future that i am going to see him no matter in indo or japan. 2 days ago i had a dinner with Yin cs in Hurricane (Bondi). so i invited Sho to come over and treat him the dinner. after dinner he took us to see a view from the corner of Bondi. ( You will be able to see the whole view from the top). As usual, Sho asked me again, How do you feel about going back to Japan?.. ( hmmm thinking about lke 9 seconds). i reply, Well i guess i am quite happy but if i am thinking about the fact that i am not going to see you again when i am going to be here on 19th of june. (Sho is going back to Japan for good), later on i will post the picture of me and sho in here.

When we were in Bondi, Yin said something funny about me n Sho, me and sho bought an ice cream so we kinda shared it together and sitting together.. sounds gay right..Yeah rite.. yin said. you guys are so romantic.. isnt it a bit weird?. haha i just laugh and said that i wont see him again. so thats alright, and Yin said, Well i can see from you guys that u both are so close and he really treat u as his friend, he cares about you. and otherwise as well.
Sho is the honest friend that i have, thanks sho for giving me such a good time and the lesson of how to be a surfer, and thanks for the Television and Dvd player that you are going to sell for me for only 20 dollars..hahaha.

This Wednesday, three of us gonna have a Miso Katsu ramen in Menya. after that, we might go straight away to the Airport. haha, Just wish me luck guys. whoever read my blog, i know i never post anything interesting no more. to be honest my life is so fuckin dull. i aint do nothing, i am a loner these day, i gotta to find some quiet place to think a lot of stuffs, later i will post something about what i thought about my ex Be, till then, Let it flow and Let it go..
Cause whenever am i..i will always be in the next chapter.
I`ll never quit writing..........never ever..

LEMONed

Pink spider

currently i am listening to the hide songs, it was great...this one is for you Hide.. to remember your talent. 2nd of may is the day u left this world.. your songs gave a lot of impact to the others.

by the way, 25th this may i am going back to medan soon.. finally i will be able to be back after 1 year. i miss all of my tomodachi, thus i fucked up my presentation just now. i dont have a clue how much did i get. i have to wait till next week for the result. it was 15% presentation i hope i will get more than 12%. i just dont really have a faith in me this semester. i am so not in mood right now to do any kind of things. i need to be alone at the moment.

How could i be so lame?. i dont wanna fail anything this semester. i have given my best to school shit. but it look like that this semester i am going down slightly. what all i can do now is to relax this week. i will go to bondi this sunday to give a break to my head. week days gonna be tough. need to make a good preparation in order to pass all of those subject.

Vice Versa

Well well well.... i am so excited knowing the fact that i am going to leave this hell.. I am going to be in medan at 27th of may..Yeah!!!... so happy.. i miss my frens.. but at first i have to tackle my exam first.. haha.. anyway.. i finaly found a new apartment.. in millenium tower.. staying with 4 others indonesian.. me so lucky..i only pay 100 dollars for a week.. but i have been staying in erycen place for about 2 months.. i guess..but start today i am going to live in my own place...
though i learnt a lot of things these couple of months.

but i realized that my only true friend is only the one back in my hometown.. miss all of you guys.. and for Syo kun.. he is the kindest person in Sydney... at least i feel secure when i was with him..compared with others indonesian mates.. and about my crush Lenny.. i reckoned that i am not interested with her anymore..since we were out. i felt like she was not a truthfully person.. she even cheat her own bf..just to go out with me.. she might do that to me someday..if we are about to be a couple..though she always try to keep in touch everyday with me.. but i dont feel the way i felt before anymore..thus the circumstances between me and her boyfriend is kinda in a high tension. i dont wanna fuck up anymore, my final exam is nearly there. need to focus, need to concentrate dont wanna fail shit!.

is it because i am going back very soon?...perhaps.. i miss all of my pretty chicks back in medan..
about my school .. i am a bit lazy this semester.. coz my my circumstances before...but luckily i passed every assignment.. hopefully i pass all of the subject at the end of my second semester..
thank god i am still breathing..lately i had a lot of conversation with my frens back in medan.. i miss all of them so much.. they are my best... nothing could exchange my fren...

i have a lot of thought about them....anyway i am going to be online everyday..start this friday..coz i already subscribe for the broadband internet in my house..so the first thing i am going to do is..to finish my flash project..hehe..coz it is sux..and very hard..
well i already promised Syo..that in the future i will go to Nagoya.. well i am a bit sad..coz the fact.. on 27th of may.. i am not gonna see him anymore..coz in june..he will back for good... so... i might just hoping that our frenship is not until here.
Well.. i have to go home now..its the Apprentice time.. haha..cant wait to watch it.

Anyway Yoshiki new album has already released. but still i havent got it. desperately to hear his new project. seems like i wont be able to buy it from Sydney. but the good thing is that i already download the songs. which is great. but still because i am a big fan of his. i wanna buy all of his album.

Blank.......

Last night finally i spent my entire night at Hotel that cost 59 dollars/ day..
it was pretty sux..i mean the whole night.
i met with one of my fren..i asked her to bring a toothpaste, comb and a bottle of a water...it was 11 i guess..then.. i talked with her, and i realized that my fren was kinda talk behind my back...the gay one.. i mean..what the fuck was that. i aint care anyway..too many things swimming in my head, and finally i met my 2 korean class mate on the road..i talked with them..and they are kinda shock..when i told them that i dont have any place to stay.
i drank a beer with them..and talking.. after that...i went back to the uts computer lab..to sleep.. and i called my mum..just to talk..but she was really worried, and then she called my bro...and then he picked me up..

we had a fight and argument each other..he said that the prob it was entirely my fault. and he said..that his fren was very angry with me.. i mean..what the hell? how could u accuse entire things into my problem, u did a lot of mistakes too..but u aint care...u are supposed to take care of everything cause u aint study and u dont have to go to the school..like me..
but i dont hate my bro..i just hate the fact that he is so selfish..he just care about himself and his fuckin bitch. but truly and honestly, i really care about my mum and my father.. i loved them so much and i always wanna do my best to make them proud of me..
this whole week has ruined my life, this week i`m going to over turn the plate!...
i am blessed

Homeless

Well.. right now i am in the middle of nowhere, i am so fucked up..and i realized how is the feeling of being lonely and homeless, This week is a whole mess for me. i thought this year i`m going to have the best year ever...but i was wrong.. the bad things started to rolling into my head.
I spent 3 days in my friends house, because my previous apartment was over. so we have to pack up and move out..so i asked my fren to let me stay..thank him for that..3 days was enough for me..and i feel so embarassed to myself, because i have to ask one by one of my class mate..whether i can stay in their house or not. but right now..i ended up in computer lab in uts. well i might spent my entire night in here..rather to stay in backpackers or whatsoever..
at least i save 30 bucks for a day...but hopefully tomorrow i will get a decent place to stay in hordern towers.. hopefully....

The shit thing is that i have to go to school at 9 in the morning..now its already 10 p.m..and i dont have a fuckin clue how am i going to sleep.. at least it wa quiet and save in here.
the good thing is that i started to feel how is the homeless people live their life everyday in the road..at least in my case i`m better than those people.
I guess this time i wont stay with my bro and his gf anymore..because we had a different opinion about renting apartment..so i think its better for us to split..
but it was really a messed when i had the argument with them..
At one moment...i started to think about going back to medan, but i wont do that..because i have to catch up with my study and shit. i dont want to dissappoint my parents. but i really do miss my fren in medan..they are the best.. and i love them so much..

i couldnt think of anything no more..i had to many things in my head. i havent got my salary yet..and i have to go to coogee and talk with my boss again..and etc...haih..
but first thing i have to do is to have a place to stay first..i mean a real place...unlike these situation.. well i hope God will bless me..

New Things

Why do i have to be in these blue verse?
these question always popped up into my head? why does it always come to my head?
i wish i wont give a head ....but still....

Many things happened to many during these holiday. Most of them were good and fun
The good things is that i passed all of my subject..yeah baby..at least i am a credit student..
In Chinesse New Year i went to the Regal restaurant with my friends, we ate a lot, laugh out loud, went to the V bar after that and get drunk. it was a funny moment when i was with my pal.
So i already quit my job because i think i will have some difficulty to wake up in the morning, cause i am about to start a new semester next week. though my parents understand about my decision. i hope they wont dissppointed with me :). today i went to watch Aviator, it was Good movie though, telling a story about one of the richest man in the world in 40`s era name Howard Hughes.

The Bad thing is that when i was walking home. i saw Lenny with her bf, i mean what the hell? i tried to call her several time but she didnt pick up my phone. during the holiday we had a good time together.and she told me that she doesnt have any feeling to her bf anymore.
Well my conclusion is that Women are all shit.. they love to lie and lie all the frickin time.
that made me sick... i aint trust no more bitches.. or maybe i dont have any luck with a girl. dont get me wrong i dont have feelings for her, i was just getting suck of women. they talk sweet and sounds very honest but inside they are fuckin full of shits. so i have had enough, all i wanted to do is now to be a loner and tell everyone to get the fuck out of my face. this is the only way to be the Greatest in the future. I need to let the circumstances in my mind to swim over my head before i act and did something stupid that will ended me up into a sin and regretness.

Cindy probs made me in a blue time, so this time i wont let anyone let me down to achieve my goal. neitheir of you bitches gonna let me down and sad for what i believe.
Thats all for now..i am no mood to write right now..i am so pissed for what i saw today. Women are all just the same. Fuckin Ho, i am so mean i fuckin know..but this is what i feel right now..at least i am being honest not like you fuckin biatch.

Break.....Time.....

Exam is over.....its time for me to relax, enjoy and hopefully can save some money. cause i didnt want to be the one that gonna call my parents to beg for the money..

at least my salary can cover up my expenses for a weeks. the thing is...i`m kinda fed up with my job in the coogee because of the people are so fuckin annoying, and some of them ought to fight all the frickin time..n get drunk like a fuckin retarded. Well hopefully next month i`ll quit...however, i have to talk and discuss about it with my mum first.
Well my exam was quit good, i think i`ll pass all of the subject. if i fail..i`ll be so fuckin pissed

a week ago, i met Cindy again in the Kura 3, i said hi to her..and thats it.. i was to shy...to talk with her...i dont want to bother her no more..without me..she`s better than ever...i should concentrate on the things that i could do..instead of give it a head about her anymore..

i`m kinda fed up with this place...sometimes like now..i feel so lonely..even though in the next 2 hours i`ll become 21 years old. how could this be? the only thing that can make me smile is that..the fact..that i still have my frens that love me so much, i miss my fren....cant wait to meet all of them..for me..they are my blood.

I am still considering whether i should continue my study or not in Sydney after i`m going to graduate in 2006 february.. i might go back and go to some other place to start my new life instead of being here..knowing that she`s around here that might bothers my goal and my mind
i dont even know..why i feel so miserable....its better for me to go to school everyday, study, get busy all the time.. if i had a lonely moment..my mind went nuts..

I need someone beside me at the moment which i couldnt have. ..sigh
Anyway may 2005 gonna be my glorious year... i`m kinda scared because my aunt told me that i might face some obstacles in this year, she told me to avoid something that is risky,
Well i should listen to her....
anyway bless me yall..